“Until you face your fears, you don’t move to the other side, where you find the power.” – Mark Allen
My second recovery week is almost complete and well.. it has been an experience of it’s own. It’s kind of funny, how things can happen in a split second.
In the last 9 weeks, I’ve had plenty oh ‘aha’ moments. They mostly happen in the pool. For example, “Oh.. when I really stretch my arm I can actually get a breath of air, instead a mouthful of water..” or “hmm when I stroke the way Ian showed me it is not bothering my shoulder..”. Well today, I had probably the biggest ‘Aha’ moment and no.. it wasn’t in the water. Let’s rewind first..
For starters, I had a great swim TT on Wednesday, I improved an average of 5 seconds per 100yd rep! I don’t need to be a swimmer to know that in 4 weeks that seems like a big chunk of time. I really worked hard on this session mentally and physically.. so much so that I questioned my ability to make it through each 100yd on every rep. Afterwords, I got a nice email from my coach about being consistent, being confident about pushing the pace from the beginning and actually holding it together.
The bike TT also seemed to go well, again I really worked this (yes- I understand what a TT stands for). I tried to stay focused as possible which just resulted in blocking everything out. Music videos were helpful for holding attention too. After each one I checked in to how I was feeling. My HR was great and RPMs were a lot higher than I expected. Needless to say, it was another successful effort on the trainer.
Despite the great week of workouts, I had WAY too much time on my hands. That’s NEVER good for me as I overanalyze anything that happens to pop into my head. So naturally all week, I was paranoid and anxious about IMLP. That I wasn’t doing enough.. that I needed to do more.. am I eating enough? am I eating too much? Can I really do this? Am I Nuts? (don’t answer that last one)
On top of all these thoughts I felt like a personal bank this week.. just handing out money left and right. I had to pay $500 in car repairs, another large grocery bill (scared to see what it is in a month), an increased electric bill and the icing on the cake, my laptop charger decided to die. This is way more than bad things come in 3s..
Thus, naturally ‘aha’ moment happened today.. I’ve been trying to listen and recover this week. Obviously the stress of the week hasn’t exactly enabled that to happen BUT it finally came all together. After a nice shakeout with Ian and picking up my bib, I was starting to feel a better. After being at the garage yesterday for almost 2 hours, I had to go back today (for another 3). After lots of crying, stress and anxiety this week, emotions finally let loose last night and briefly this morning. Therefore, as I am sitting in the garage it finally hits me, why I’ve been so NUTSO this week, *drum roll* AHA: LAKE PLACID IS NOT TOMORROW, Sunday April 6th at 7:00am. It is Sunday, July 27th at ~7:00AM, which is still over 3 months away. Again, Lisa you doof, you aren’t supposed to be able to do an Ironman tomorrow.
This *aha* was then reinforced by Chrissie Wellington 🙂
I just managed to stumble upon reading chapters 9 (Face to Face with the Ironman) and 10 (A Triathlete’s Life) of A Life Without Limits by Chrissie Wellington. I won’t bore you with all the details of the chapters but if you haven’t read it yet, I highly recommend it. I’m still not sure how it happened, but I needed these chapters. All of a sudden a weight has been lifted, I feel calm and making a mental note that I’ll have to re-read those chapters.. probably every month.
As I head out of recovery week into the Skunk Cabbage 13.1 and back into a full week of training, I owe a big THANK YOU to a few people who pulled my back from the edge this week – Douglas, Alex, Rebecca, Katie, Ian and Marie – THANK YOU SO MUCH. You helped me through this week more than you know.